A reflection on a life well lived.
If you're new here, you may want to subscribe to my RSS feed. Thanks for visiting!
Happy Father’s Day to all of the fathers out there. Having a large family it makes it for an interesting day for me. However this Father’s Day has some special connotations for me this year. Earlier in the week we buried my last living Grandfather.
He had a great life. He lived to be 85 years old without ever having any real health issues. One of the things that really stuck me about his life, I never knew him to dislike anyone or ever be mad. Never not once can I remember an incidence of him being genuinely upset other than the passing of my Grand Mother over 30 years ago. However he languished after her departing in a rather humble dedication to her in obscurity.
As a child I can remember the times we had in his rocket ship, an early 70’s Ford Maverick, the buttons on the dash and the big lights were part of command central and it was always a treat to travel with him to our favorite five star restaurant, McDonald’s, to feed the sea gulls French fries and enjoy a milkshake.
It was this dedication to others that made his life completely remarkable. He never placed himself before others and made sure that those that meant the most to him enjoyed their existence.
Peepaw thank you for the memories.
“We have lift off”
Dessie Howard Oglesby, Jr August 11,1922 - June 11, 2008
What’s on First, Who’s Second and They Can’t Come in Third
Realigning priorities is always tough to do especially when you have as many passions as I do. Occasionally I find some of my own personal and financial endeavors taking a precedent over the most important aspect of my being. When I catch this happening it become a mental paralysis for me then nothing functions well. My balance gets completely out of kilter and things start crumbling in the “Path of Paul”.
I have obligations to family, friends, business partners and work in that order. However some of those overlap and it makes some decisions even tougher to make. Unfortunately my job as an Internet Sales Manager takes up the majority of my time and it is the least important aspect in the grand scheme of things.
Time to take a break and reflect on my next step to get back on path of holding up my end of the deal in many respects.
Things that Mean a lot to Me
I use squidoo for many different things. Mostly though it is a search engine monster when marketing goods or services I usually save content that has no marketing appeal to my personal blog here. Hoever I could not resist to try squidoo out for talking about Raising a Child With a Cleft Lip and it was met with overwhelming acceptance by that community and was given the honor of “Lens of the Day”.
Letting expecting parents know that having a child with a cleft lip or palate is no different than raising other children is very important to me. I just hope that it gets some of the search engine dominance it deserves for the terms I geared the page to to help other parents.
So if you want to know more about raising a child with a cleft lip or cleft palate please visit my first ever Lens of the Day.
“How Big a Boy Are Ya?”
My son Alexander is a big boy no doubt, but I never had put things into perspective until his recent class picture. He is without a doubt the biggest kid in his class.
If you cant figure out which one he is go see an optometrist…
So Much Going On - Ready for a break…
I need a vacation. No work just mindless activities with no schedule. My daily regimen is taking a toll. I have so much going on with work, kids and my online business it is starting to wear me down some. I don’t think I have a type A personality but one is starting to creep in to the point of being cynical at times.
The bad thing about having so many different things going on it makes it hard to do one thing exceptionally well. I put being a father to my children first in my daily priorities, but other task are interfering with this largest priority in my life. It is not a bad thing that I am busting my ass to make things better for them in the future, but at what expense?
I will wake up one morning and realize that the kids have a life of their own that does not include me in their daily plans. I am already experiencing that to some extent with my oldest children. Benjamin and Rebecca are now young adults and living their life on their terms, which I expected they would, while the younger three are still very reliant on me for everything and because of this reliance I am forced to be away from them during the best times of the day with them.
I have planned a vacation with the whole gang after the youngest ones are out of school for the summer. Nothing really extravagant but it will be 5 days with with the whole gang having no schedule and no place to be at a certain time. Hopefully we can enjoy some uninterrupted family time with the whole gang present.
Going Coastal - Spring Break
Well spring break is about over and with my new position as an Internet Sales Manger at Carl Gregory in Brunswick we had to sacrifice our customary trip to Wild Adventures in exchange for a trip to the beach. While a trip to the beach for many is a once in a lifetime event we are fortunate to live “Coastal”, so it is always available to us.
Sometimes we take these things for granted. Living in the middle of so many natural resources we overlook obvious inexpensive family outings. This was Preston’s first visit while Tyler and Alex have been to the beach a few times it was a great inexpensive family outing.
This trip reminded me why I chose to stay in this area and not take advantage of opportunities in other parts of the country. We have a
moderate winter climate and I just love the water. After moving inland a few years ago I had forgotten how much I actually love the beach and all of the things that it entails living close to it. So now we have decided to buy a new home within walking distance of the water while the real estate market is getting hammered down in Brunswick, Georgia.
We found a nice property today that needs some repairs and are going to make an offer on it tomorrow. I hope we they take our offer, because it will allow us to casually sell our current home and not worry about being in a financial bind as we make the transition to “Going Coastal” and having the freedom to casually stroll the beaches at the end of a long day.
Everywhere I go things are happening…
Since returning to the work force as an Internet Sales Manger I meet new interesting people daily and am enriched from the experience. You get to learn the dynamics of other peoples lives in their family life and business life and open yours up to them. It is a give and take and how you adapt to these interactions can enrich you or cause you to lose faith in many things.
I am a perpetual optimist who happens to be a bit too pragmatic at times. An oxymoron to say the least, but that is who I am. I find it humorous when people try to hide their weaknesses by attacking others. We have all seen it in our daily lives and am not going to delve into examples here. On the other side of that is when people realize their mistakes and use those as stepping stones to improve themselves and contributions to society, mistakes are the best learning tool we have.
Some of the things that have been going on around me lately in my life has caused me to reexamine some of my long term goals and it is due to interactions with others. In the near term I do plan on maintaining my position as an Internet Sales Manager and keep my options open. The rising cost of my son’s health care is casing me to realize the importance low cost health insurance, which spawned my return to the automobile industry and the networking opportunities that have resulted in this reentry into the regular workforce have proven bountiful.
My long term goal is to take the knowledge that I am developing and transform it into a niche business inside of a very lucrative marketplace as an Automotive Online Marketing Consultant and it is coming to fruition a lot faster than I had planned and has placed me at a crossroads and now must make a decision to move forward with that goal or happily do what I am doing and enjoy the comfortable success I have found.
I have the opportunity to partner with a leading automotive training firm as a consultant to develop some core products and to provide hands on training in dealerships across the country and the fears that are associated with entering the arena of the unknown or to remain in a position of omnipotence and answering only to myself.
Decisions, decisions, both roads are less traveled either way I am in for a bumpy ride, hopefully though it will not be in a circle like this blog post..
The Net Can Be Fun - At Least I Have a Sense of Humor
It is well known I am a very vocal person and do not hide behind masks in my dealings online. It is funny though when people try to take unfounded potshots at me. Sometimes they don’t like the return of the favor.
I was pretty vocal about the launch of the PayPerPlay network and the revival of the NetAudioAds Affiliate program and even dedicate a site to it. What is funny is that they resorted to attempted character assasionation in an effort to downplay the truths of their organization. A person who is basically anonymous started a site geared towards me that talks about me filing bankruptcy multiple times. While I did file in the EARLY 90’s, due to becoming an adult too early in life it is comical that all the rest of the stuff she puts out there is just a mere attempt to take credibility away from me.
She takes shots about being the father of a child with a cleft lip and palate, my rant here about a troll leaving threating comments on this blog and claims I filed bankruptcy two times this year, which did not happen, she even claims I was born near Monroe, LA. (Brunswick, GA is where I was born).
What is nice though is that they try to use the content here as a way to denigrate me and send me a bunch of traffic. The thing is this is my only site that has no level of online “monetization” on it but I still like the free traffic. Too bad I took the time to even post on this but tons of traffic is coming from her diatribe and I thought I would let people know the truth, as that is not in the cards from NetAudioAds and PayPerPlay and never will be.
It is all fun and games now………
The love of a child and redemption
To often is it easy to forget that our children love us unconditionally. They love us no matter what just as we love them for being our children, unconditionally. Tonight I had an experience that happens all to often. The kids were not following instructions and dad was loosing his cool. Only to be reminded that I too was a child once. Without boring you with the details the kids were showing out in a restaurant and I wanted no part of it and felt trapped, completely helpless and I am the one in the family that they look to for leadership. I responded instead of reacting and made it an unpleasant evening for all.
On our ride home I was reminded several times by the children that they were sorry for misbehaving and my wife gave a scornful look. It makes a long ride home longer. Only to find that there are other issues when we return home. Homework not done, kids not wanting to bathe and a wife who is getting more frustrated with me and the children. I had a decision to make and make fast to save the evening from being completely ruined. So I did as any studios husband, father does. I let selective listening take over and started to tune out the noise around me. Another bad choice.
Through no great effort of mine the homework got done, the children were bathed and put to bed and my bride was still not very cheerful. Lost for words I could only do what I could and hugged and held her like we were giddy teenagers again only to be interrupted buy a child not feeling well. Sigh..
I took the time to tend to the child and get them back asleep only to find my wife sleeping soundly for me to deliver a kiss from the falsely ailing child, helped her get into bed only to find myself telling the world about it.
The silent house, sleeping children and bride and no interruptions cause me to reflect on how to redeem this day and allow kids to be kids, and to keep that unconditional love coming in.
Raising a Child With a Cleft and a Political Rant..
See How Larry Host the CTO of NetAudioAds takes care of his family….. Larry Host Conviction Record for Not Paying Child Support
**************************************************************
My youngest child was born with a bilateral cleft lip and palate. I have some before and after pictures of the start of his repairs in a previous post. I have a a page on HubPages that reaches out to people who have discovered that their child was going to be born with a cleft lip or palate. I usually receive an email or two a week from expectant parents and try to encourage them that everything is going to be ok.
One recent email I received was from a young lady who said because I took the time to reach out and encourage her she decided not to have an abortion. I was in tears from this email. Having dealt with the stress of surgeries and doctors appointments after the birth of Preston has been a hair raising experience at times and if it were possible for me to trade places with him and allow the doctors to work on me I would do it in a heartbeat. If we would of known that he was going to have a cleft lip and palate prior to him being born an abortion would of never been an option. That is a personal choice of mine that my wife agrees with. There is nothing more precious in this world than the unconditional love that you give and receive from your children.
Abortion to me is an aberration, I do believe it does have its place, but to terminate an unborn child’s life over a correctable situation would be unconscionable, but in todays society it takes even less than that for people to decide to have an abortion. This email though made me do some research on cleft lip children and abortions and I found a story that once again that cause me to have tears well up.
It described how doctors were given a pass for performing a late term abortion on a woman who was pregnant with a child with a cleft lip. Knowing what I do about a two year old with the most severe form of this birth defect it made me realize that I need to use my SEO skills to help spread the word on how normal a child with a cleft really is and in time everything will be ok.
If I can change just one more persons mind it is worth it.
-
-
Other "Stuff"
